


I'm Not A Virgin Anymore (I wish)

by Corycides



Series: Tumbling On [8]
Category: Revolution (TV)
Genre: Crack, F/M, honestly, it is crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-04
Updated: 2013-12-04
Packaged: 2018-01-03 12:21:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1070417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Corycides/pseuds/Corycides
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>‘You were always the one.’</p><p>Yeah, Miles had thought it was a good idea at the time. Turns out the problem with death bed confessions of passion to your ex - or to your long-standing never-actually-was - is that sometimes it turns out you’re not on your death bed. Bloody nanites.</p><p>Now Rachel kept looking at him like he was on a promise - all sidelong smiles and touches and murmurs about ‘as soon as we’re alone’. Admiral Nelson never had to deal with this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Not A Virgin Anymore (I wish)

**Author's Note:**

> Bea2me’s Prompt: If you write Miles as secretly a virgin I will sacrifice a cheese wheel in the desperate hope that Kripke steals this nugget from you for use in canon. At least then we’d know he’s not Charlie’s father.

_‘You were always the one.’_

Yeah, Miles had thought it was a good idea at the time. Turns out the problem with death bed confessions of passion to your ex - or to your long-standing never-actually-was - is that sometimes it turns out you’re not on your death bed. Bloody nanites.

Now Rachel kept looking at him like he was on a promise - all sidelong smiles and touches and murmurs about ‘as soon as we’re alone’. Admiral Nelson never had to deal with this.

‘I feel like a deer,’ he told Charlie, slouching down at the kitchen table. ‘Or a rabbit, just staring into the headlights.’

Charlie gave him a sceptical look over the table, waving her spoon at him. ‘You’ve been mooning after Rachel for months,’ she said. ‘Since even before Nora died.’

The guilt of that was still raw. He looked away, swallowing the old, sour taste of lies. Charlie ignored his misery.

‘So cheer up. You’re about to get banged like a drum by the love of your life. Some of us haven’t had any since bloody New Vegas.’

Miles grabbed his cup and took a swig of the gritty rye brew. Scalding hot and fresh from the pot it could pass for coffee. At least, it could if you hadn’t drunk coffee for a long time. He gulped the mouthful down and grimaced.

‘That’s when you found Bass, right?’ he said, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. ‘Ever think there’s some sort of connection.’

It was Charlie’s turn to look like lemur caught in the headlights. ‘No! I don’t want...I don’t think about him that way. He’s old. Old as you.’

Yeah. Miles wasn’t touching that one with a bargepole. He took another swig of coffee-ish to give him something more immediately horrible to think about.

‘Not what I meant,’ he said. ‘Bass is a cock-block. While he’s around, no-one gets laid. Except him. Constantly, the bastard.’

Charlie had gone sort of pink - Miles wasn’t dwelling on that - and she sucked porridge that was mostly raspberry and honey off her spoon. ‘Why are you even telling me this?’ she asked grumpily. ‘It is not exactly appropriate.’

He waited for her to take a drink of milk.

‘I’m a virgin.’

She didn’t have the decency to do a spit-take, just sat there with her cheeks plump with milk and stared at him. Her throat worked as she swallowed. ‘What?’

‘I’m a virgin.’

‘Very funny.’

‘Not really.’

‘But...’ Charlie flapped her hand at him. ‘Mom!’

Miles shrugged. 'Bass was a groomsman.'

* * *

_Rachel tucked her cold fingers in his pockets and her nose against his collarbone. He could feel her heartbeat. She could feel the cock pressing against her stomach._

_'This is wrong,' she whispered._

_'So wrong,' he agreed hoarsely._

_'I love Ben, I do,' Rachel said, looking up at him. 'It's just...I don't want him. Not like I want you.'_

_Don't gulp, Miles told himself sternly, don't come in your pants._

_'I want you too,' he said. 'But he's my brother; I can't steal his girl.'_

_His fiancé. At their wedding rehearsal._

_'I can't leave him; I can't do that to him,' Rachel agreed. Which was a bit of a disappointment. Except her hands weren't in her pockets anymore, and the shock of cold skin against his erection made him jump. 'All we have is tonight.'_

_He twisted his hands in her jumper and pulled her close, his mouth coming down and..._

_The door burst open and Bass stumbled out, breathing steam and beer breath into the cold. He blinked at them and shoved his hand through his short curls. 'There you are!' He said. 'Everyone is looking for you, Rachel. Your mom is looked in the toilet and won't come out and your Uncle Bob got so drunk he grabbed Ben's ass.'_

_Rachel jumped back from Miles like he was hot, leaving him to scrabble for his dignity. She wiped her hands on her trousers and smoothed her hair down. 'I...I better go and sort it out.'_

_She disappeared back inside, closing the door behind her with a click of finality. Bass pulled a flask out his pocket and offered it to Miles._

_'So, what were you talking to frosty-knickers about?' he asked._

* * *

'Oh,' Charlie said. She bit her lower lip, caught somewhere between laughter and sympathy. 'Emma?'

'I was...in a lot of trouble. We never managed.'

* * *

_'It doesn't matter,' Emma said, rolling off him. She hitched her hips up, tugging her jeans up and buttoning them. 'I just want to be here with you.'_

_She cuddled into his side. Miles clenched his jaw and resisted the urge to shove her off. He did want her, he felt sick with wanting her, it was just sluggish when it came to waking up his drink-muzzy dick._

_'I gotta go,' he said, rolling off the bed and grabbing his jeans. His fingers proved as uncooperative as his genitals, fumbling at buttons like he was wearing gloves. 'I said I would meet Bass.'_

_She looked away, mouth tight behind the veil of her hair. At the time he and thought she was angry with him._

* * *

Charlie was starting to look like she believed him. She pushed her breakfast out of the way and shoved her hair back from her face. 'You were in the marines though? Monroe, on the way here, talked about all the partying you used to do."

'Yeah, about that...'

* * *

_Later on he would remember this as the night of the Blackout, and think he should have been doing something...more. Making the most of it. Instead he was in a club with stick floors, 'Burn It Down' distorting on the bass as he mimed a conversation with a pretty girl. Her hair was blue, not red or blonde, and her fingers were tracing patterns on his wrist._

_'So, when do you have to go back to base?' she asked, leaning in close so he could feel her boob on his arm and his breath on his cheek. 'Do you have time for a...nightcap?'_

_He chased the dry out of his throat with a gulp of beer and opened his mouth-_

_An arm hooked around his throat, ink flashing, and a tipsy Bass dragged him into a hug. 'I love you, man,' Bass said enthusiastically. 'You know that right?' He swung his attention and those blue eyes and that huge, gleeful grin onto the blue-haired girl. 'I love him! He is my...my fucking life-partners.'_

_She managed a smile and a 'congratulations' before making her escape. Bass leant his chin on Miles shoulder. 'I need a lift back.'_

* * *

'Wow. Nora?'

'She drank a lot.'

* * *

 

_It wasn't that Miles minded the sweet, warm weight of Nora on him, all compact muscle and soft curves. It was just that she had gone very..._

_'Are you ok?' he asked, brushing her hair out of her face. The soft curls twisted around his fingers._

_She burped in his face, farted and snuggled closer._

_'Shit.'_

* * *

 

Charlie stared at him, her chin propped in her hand. 'That is tragic.'

'Thanks,' Miles grumbled. 'Pity was exactly the reaction I wanted.'

She sat up and back, hitching her knee up. 'Well, what do you want? I'm not giving you the talk. Ask Aaron, he did it for me and Danny.'

'Rather stab myself and hope it sticks this time,' Miles growled. 'Dont you just...I don't know, have any advice?'

Charlie shrugged her slim shoulders. 'Why? It's not like I want you to have sex with my mom. This sounds perfect to him, you can just be sexless companions in your old age.'

Miles slouched back in his chair and stared at the ceiling. 'Great. Sounds fun.'

 


End file.
